Sweet Days (Four Days Book 2) Page 4

  sighing. I hope she doesn’t want to talk because

  I’m really not able to talk right now.

  Sure, I can go with her, help her look for her

  stuff and bring it back here in the least amount of

  time possible, just as long as she understands I’m

  not the person she can vent her feelings with, or

  someone she can open up to, because that’s not the

  case. I already made a mistake last week, letting

  her cry on my shoulder, or in fact, in my arms,

  because I held her tight—I wanted to. I think that’s

  enough for one lifetime.

  I turn on the engine and take off in a hurry; Erin

  puts her seatbelt on and gives me a furtive glance,

  which I do not return.

  As I get further from the city, I head toward

  Dublin. I know the area where he lives but don’t

  know the exact address, so I’m forced to open my

  mouth.

  “Address?” I ask without looking at her and use

  just the necessary words and no more.

  “Whitehall, do you know it? Where the school

  is?”

  I nod.

  “The apartment is near there, I’ll tell you when

  we get closer.”

  I nod again, keeping my eyes on the road, intent

  on keeping my lip zipped until we get back to the

  pub.

  I should have stayed out of this, I know, but I

  already understood what was going on. It’s

  certainly obvious that it’s better to have one person

  missing from work rather than two, but if I were to

  tell the truth, I don’t like that asshole at all and I’d

  like to see him out of Erin’s life as soon as

  possible, without any bloodshed.

  Erin has been working at Only4you for a good

  while by now, and she’s like one of the family.

  And then, let’s be honest, that guy Nate is an

  asshole, spoilt and pompous, someone who

  probably set foot in the pub maybe three times in

  the last six months, evidently not wanting to mix

  with the clientele or maybe he’s just afraid of

  getting his ass kicked, which is what he deserves.

  Erin clears her throat.

  Shit. Is she about to say something?

  “Uh … thanks.”

  I take a deep breath. “No problem.”

  “For the other night too.”

  “You don’t need to. Don’t thank me.”

  Erin bites her lower lip, and I can see from out

  of the corner of my eye that she’s about to cry

  again.

  “I hope to be quick about this,” she says quietly.

  “We’ll go in and be out in two minutes. When

  the tooth is gone, so is the pain.”

  Too many words, Patrick. Control yourself.

  Erin looks at me sadly, even though she is

  smiling. I shouldn’t get into this emotional stuff, I

  really don’t want to. I know this is not my

  territory.

  “It really ended that badly?” I find myself

  saying, without knowing why.

  She doesn’t answer, just looks out the passenger

  side window and we continue in silence until she’s

  forced to speak to me in order to give directions.

  We get out of the car and start walking towards

  the door of the main building in which there are a

  maximum of two apartments. Erin uses the key to

  open it and we go up a ramp of stairs that brings us

  to a door to the upstairs apartment. She takes a

  deep breath and slowly opens it, making a sign that

  I should go in. As soon as we close the door, that

  asshole makes his triumphant appearance.

  “I should have known you would have brought

  that gorilla,” Nate says.

  Gorilla? What’s his beef with me? Is this the

  date he wants written on his tombstone?

  “I don’t have a car, Nate. You know that.”

  “You could have taken a taxi.”

  “You could mind your own fucking business

  and tell us where her things are,” I say without

  bothering to censor my words.

  “They’re bunched up over there,” he says,

  indicating behind him. “I went to the trouble of

  putting it all away so you don’t have any more

  stress.”

  He speaks almost sarcastically. I can see that he

  didn’t pack her things in order to be nice, for some

  reason he just wants to humiliate her. I’d really

  like to know what Erin could have done to deserve

  such behavior.

  I shake my head and pass him, not bothering to

  avoid brushing against him. He doesn’t move, just

  adjusts his jacket and faces her again, this time

  seeming a bit calmer and softer in his approach.

  “Where will you go?”

  I hear Erin reply in a whisper as I lift up two

  boxes:

  “You know full well that I have no place to go.”

  She leaves the phrase dangling.

  Erin comes closer to me and takes one of the

  boxes.

  “What are you going to do now?” the asshole

  asks her. What a gentleman!

  “That’s none of your business,” Erin answers,

  going toward the door.

  “I’d like to help. Maybe I could ask around if

  they’ve got a room on campus.”

  “I don’t need your help, you’ve already done

  enough. You left me in the middle of the street,

  Nate!”

  I’m waiting there, laden with boxes and I can

  feel the anger spreading from my toes to my head.

  “I didn’t want it to end like this,” Nate carries

  on. “I love you, Erin, and I did love you very

  much, it’s just that with her…” the asshole

  concludes, trying to be nice. “Let me help you. It’s

  the least I can do.”

  Erin shakes her head and opens the door. None

  of the three of us says anything until we’re

  standing in front of the car. Erin hands the keys to

  the apartment to Nate.

  “If you should come across anything that’s

  mine, please let me know.”

  “Erin, please—”

  She blocks him by holding up her open hand in

  front of his mouth.

  Nate lowers his head and looks at his feet. Erin

  looks around, clearly uncomfortable and I

  understand that I have to leave them alone for a

  minute so they can say goodbye.

  I get in the car, turn on the engine and look in

  the wing mirror. Nate opens his arms, but Erin

  shakes her head and gets in the car, holding her

  hands over her eyes.

  Fuck.

  “Go, Patrick,” she tells me through her

  hiccupping. I do as she tells me without asking

  questions and without adding anything.

  I park a few meters from the bar along the

  street. Erin hasn’t opened her mouth and I’ve

  followed her lead. I turn off the engine and rest my

  head on the steering wheel next to my hands.

  “And so … another woman?” I venture.

  “Please, I don’t want to talk about it.”

  “Erin.” I slowly lift up my head and look at her.

  She’s scared and looks as if she’s about to have

  another brea
kdown.

  “I just need some time, okay? I have to

  understand what to do.”

  I nod and open the car door.

  “Well, let’s bring this stuff upstairs.”

  4

  Erin

  “Thanks, Patrick. Leave it there, I’ll take care of it

  later.”

  I set the last box down near the door and sit

  down on the couch.

  Rain practically assaulted me with questions as

  soon as we got back, but I asked her to leave me

  alone for a while and she respected my request,

  telling me to call her if I wanted anything.

  “If you tell me where they go, I can bring

  them,” Patrick says to me.

  “You’ve done enough.”

  He huffs and cleans his hands on his jeans

  before going to the kitchen and putting the kettle

  on.

  I turn abruptly. “What are you doing?”

  “Making tea.”

  “Patrick—”

  “The other morning I was a mess and you made

  me a cup of coffee and you let me work out my

  bad mood because you knew that’s what I needed.

  Now you’re the one who needs something. You

  need a cup of tea, to help you to relax and to calm

  you down. I’d like to return the favor.”

  I look at him, frowning, while he moves

  through the kitchen. He brings me a hot cup of tea

  with three chocolate cookies bought yesterday at

  Tesco. I look at the cup and then at the cookies

  while I feel a wave of nausea pushing itself

  upwards. I cover my mouth with my hands and run

  to the bathroom where I arrive just in time to get

  on my knees. I puke out everything, including my

  soul, while my retching mixes with my sobbing.

  Patrick slowly approaches with a towel; he gets

  it wet under the tap and gets down on his knees

  beside me, wetting my forehead. The relief is

  instantaneous. I close my eyes and fall backwards,

  sitting on the floor and resting against his chest.

  “Does that asshole know?” he asks me directly.

  “What? How did you—”

  “I’m the first of six kids, Erin. I learned how to

  tell the signs really quickly.”

  “You’ve worked all that out from a bit of

  nausea?” I ask with a shrill voice.

  “No, I’ve picked up on your secret by seeing the

  terror in your eyes.”

  I turn slowly to look at him while my eyes fill

  with tears. I shake my head and I cover my face

  with my hands so I don’t have to see his

  expression, which would tell me that he thinks I

  am stupid and foolish.

  Patrick lets the towel drop to the ground. Then

  he grabs my shoulders and he lets me rest against

  his shoulders. I let my head fall back and permit

  him to console me, in silence, and to hear me cry.

  “Why didn’t you tell him?”

  I dry my eyes and break away from him. I slide

  to the side and rest my back on the wall, hugging

  my legs.

  “Because he has another woman, Patrick. He

  fell in love with an American researcher who just

  got here two months ago. There’s nothing I can

  do.”

  “What a fucker.”

  “I just did the test. For the third time to be

  exact. I was waiting for him at home to tell him. I

  knew it would have been a shock for him just like

  it was for me. We weren’t going through the best

  period and now maybe I understand why, but I

  thought maybe this would bring us closer … I

  know, that was stupid. You can’t fix things like

  that, but what could I do? By now, it’s done. But

  when this thing came out … I didn’t feel like I

  could tell him. What would be the point? He’s in

  love with someone else, Patrick. Another woman

  is already sleeping in our bed…” I burst out crying

  again.

  “Have … have you thought about what to do?”

  I freeze up and look him right in the eye. Of

  course I’ve thought about it.

  “There are some alternatives,” he says

  cautiously.

  Alternatives. There’s only one alternative and I

  don’t believe I’m able to make a decision like that.

  “A lot of girls in your situation go to England.

  It’s allowed there, you know.”

  I sigh.

  “I think you still have some time to decide.”

  I nod, trying to stand. Patrick gets up before I

  do and holds out his hand to help me. I accept his

  hand and pull myself up, and then I wash my face

  and brush my teeth before going back into the

  living room, where he has just gone.

  I find him sitting on the couch with the same

  cup as before in his hands.

  “It’s still hot,” he says, touching the bottom of

  the cup. “It’ll do you good. You’ll see—the worst

  has passed.”

  I sit on the couch where he makes space for me.

  I rest my back on the armrest and stretch out my

  legs until they’re touching his. He goes rigid right

  away and sits up straight, playing nervously with

  that metal thing in his tongue.

  Brrr.

  “You want me to go call Rain?”

  “No, please don’t. She’d worry too much and

  start crying.”

  “You want to be alone?”

  Alone? I’m terrified of being alone but what am

  I supposed to do? Ask him to stay? Just him?

  I don’t answer, lost in my thoughts. Patrick

  must have understood because he finally takes off

  his jacket and hangs it on the armchair next to us,

  then he settles in and grabs my ankles and so my

  feet rest on his legs.

  I get red and try to take them away but he keeps

  them in place with a hand. He doesn’t say anything

  and I don’t ask.

  Sometimes words are really overrated.

  Patrick

  What am I doing in this apartment? What the heck

  am I doing here with her?

  Oh, go on, what else could I have done?

  Abandoned her? Made her feel more alone than

  she already does?

  She is completely terrified. She has no one.

  Her father is away and her house is being rented

  out. She studies and has a part-time job with us

  and she’s practically out on the street because of

  that asshole who didn’t know how to keep his dick

  in his pants. God, If I find him on the streets I

  think I’ll kill him with my own hands. Oh, it’s

  true, he doesn’t know that Erin is … I can’t even

  say it. Erin’s pregnant. By that asshole. And he’s

  got another woman.

  What a fucking mess.

  Maybe she should have told him, but what

  would have happened? Would he have stayed with

  her because he ‘had to’? What kind of life would

  that be? It’s already mighty hard raising children

  when a couple love each other, can you imagine

  what it must be like when the man is in love with

  someone else? Nah. It would be a certified

  disaster. An unhappy life sentence. Even if I think />
  he should take on his responsibility like a man, it

  takes two to tango.

  I take off Erin’s boots for her and I massage her

  ankles. I don’t know why I’m doing it, I don’t

  think she needs it, I guess maybe it’s just so as not

  to be the asshole I usually am. Then I sigh and out

  come the words:

  “You’ll stay here.”

  I didn’t have to think about it at all.

  Erin looks at me without speaking.

  “You don’t think Rain is going to let you go

  anywhere, do you?” I tell her.

  No one would let her go anywhere.

  I couldn’t ever let her go anywhere.

  “I can’t afford to…”

  “Don’t say anything else. We don’t need rent for

  this apartment. If we did, why would it still be

  empty?”

  “I can’t accept that, Patrick. Besides, you

  haven’t spoken about it with the others.”

  The others? No one would ever object to

  offering a place to stay for a lady in trouble,

  especially the guys.

  “I’ll tell them tonight, but I already know

  there’s no need. As soon as they know about—”

  “No,” she interrupts me. “Please, don’t tell

  anyone.”

  “You can’t keep it hidden forever.”

  “Wait just until I’ve made a decision, please. It’s

  already so embarrassing that you know about it.”

  “You don’t have to worry about me. I’ve got

  lots of embarrassing things on my resume.”

  “Yeah, well, I’m sure you have,” she says, her

  mouth folding up into a smile.

  I smile back at her and shake my head.

  Does everybody know about me?

  Erin scoots down more on the couch until her

  head is resting on the armrest. She yawns and has

  droopy eyes as if she is about to close them and

  fall asleep.

  “Tell me about your latest conquest,” she says,

  turning on her side.

  “I don’t think you want to hear about it.”

  “I do, please. It’ll keep my mind busy.”

  Well all right, if she really wants to know.

  I start to tell her about the girl with the alluring

  eyes and how I provoked her by biting on the ring

  on my lip, giving her undeniable signals. I talk to

  her about my technique and how I assure myself in

  advance that’s all they want from me. She laughs,

  shakes her head and makes fun of me. I laugh too,

  even though I’m the butt of the joke. I start to

  breathe slower because I realize that Erin is

  relaxing and I am too.

  I can’t imagine what she must feel and in

  reality, I shouldn’t even think about it. I stay away